The Hidden Mental Load of Holiday Prep And How to Handle It
Photo by Andrii Lysenko
Ah, the holidays! A time for joy, togetherness, and—oh right—secretly shouldering the 10,000 responsibilities that magically transform your home into a festive wonderland. If you're the one remembering to buy Aunt Sue’s gluten-free cookies or making sure the kids' pajamas match, congrats—you’re dealing with the hidden mental load of holiday prep! But have no fear, we’ve got your back.
What exactly is the mental load? And why does it ramp up during the most wonderful time of the year? Let’s dive in, tackle it head on, and (spoiler alert) introduce you to a little helper named eeva who can take some of that weight off your plate.
BTW, you’re not alone! Check out what real moms around the world have said about the weight of the holiday mental load.
What Is the Mental Load?
The mental load is the invisible labor that comes with managing a household. It’s not just about doing tasks; it’s about remembering them, anticipating and planning them, and coordinating everyone else to get them done. Think of it as the holiday party planner who works behind the scenes, except that planner is you, every single day. Want to dive deeper into this invisible labor? Check out our blog on The Mental Load and How You Can Manage It.
During the holidays, this load gets heavier. Between gift shopping, meal planning, and navigating the minefield of family dynamics (because heaven forbid you forget to invite Cousin Jerry), it’s easy to feel overwhelmed.
The Holiday-Specific Mental Load
Here’s a fun exercise: grab a piece of paper and jot down every little task you’ve taken on this holiday season. Now, take a look. Is it terrifyingly long? Thought so.
Common Culprits Include:
Decorating: Who’s remembering where all the decorations are AND hanging the wreaths? You.
Gifting: Finding the perfect present for everyone, staying on budget, and wrapping them up like a pro.
Food Planning: From grocery lists to coordinating dietary needs, you’re basically running a Michelin-star kitchen.
Event Management: Whether it’s a kids’ pageant or a work potluck, you’re the one RSVPing, scheduling, and showing up with a smile (or trying to).
This mental marathon leaves little room for actual enjoyment. But don’t worry—here are ways to lighten the load this holiday season!
Photo by Odua Images
How to Handle the Holiday Hustle (Without Losing Your Mind)
The key to conquering the mental load of holiday prep isn’t working harder—it’s working smarter. Here’s how to reclaim your time, your sanity, and maybe even some actual holiday spirit this year.
1. Delegate Like a Pro
Repeat after us: You don’t have to do it all. Seriously. The holidays are a team effort, so start acting like a coach. Here’s how to delegate effectively:
Make a Master List: Write down every single task, from sending holiday cards to assembling that new coffee table for guests. Then, assign names next to each item.
Play to Strengths: Got a teenager who loves baking? Hand over the cookie-making. Spouse good at DIY? They’re in charge of outdoor decorations. Assign age appropriate tasks to people who will actually enjoy—or at least tolerate—them. Here are some extra tips to get the kids involved too!
Let Go of Perfection: Yes, your 8-year-old’s gift wrapping may look like it survived a tornado, but the job’s done. Plus, it’ll be something to laugh about with the whole fam! Focus on progress, not perfection.
Pro tip: Use eeva to create shared lists, tasks, and events, and assign them to your household members. Track their progress and see what they’re up to, without all the needless back and forth.
If you’re ready to make delegation a habit, our post on The Power of Routines: Establishing Daily Habits for a Well-Managed Home has you covered.
2. Set Boundaries (and Stick to Them)
The holidays have a sneaky way of expanding your to-do list without asking. The trick? Set clear boundaries and defend them like your favorite holiday cookies.
Say No to Overcommitting: It’s tempting to say yes to every holiday party and family event, but spreading yourself too thin leads to burnout. Choose the gatherings that matter most and politely decline the rest.
Set a Budget—For Time and Money: Block out time in your calendar for non-negotiable self-care (like binge-watching your favorite holiday movie). This also means setting financial limits. The stress of overspending isn't festive!
Communicate Your Limits: Let others know early what you’re willing—and unwilling—to take on. Whether it’s “I can’t host this year” or “I’m buying desserts instead of making them,” clarity is kindness.
3. Get Yourself a Holiday Assistant
We all have that friend who’s somehow on top of everything, and if you don’t, eeva will gladly fill the role. This home & life management app keeps your holidays organized (all in one place) so you can keep your cool. Here’s how eeva can help:
Task Management: Create shared task lists for holiday prep, and assign tasks to your family with due dates. No more nagging—everyone gets their reminders directly from eeva.
Smart Reminders: eeva ensures you never miss a beat, whether it’s setting a reminder to order the ham or alerting you to the last day for free shipping.
Streamlined Collaboration: Keep track of everyone’s responsibilities in one place. You’ll never hear, “I didn’t know I was supposed to do that,” again.
Bonus: eeva is great for tracking those oddball traditions, like remembering which drawer you stuffed the advent calendar in last year.
4. Streamline Gift Giving
Gift-giving is one of the biggest holiday stressors, but it doesn’t have to be. Try these strategies to make it less of a headache:
Set a Theme: Simplify your shopping by choosing a theme like “local finds” or “experience gifts.” This narrows your options and keeps gifting thoughtful but straightforward. Need some ideas? Check these out!
Create a Shared Wishlist: For family and friends, encourage everyone to use a shared wishlist (yes, eeva can help with that). It’s efficient, ensures everyone gets what they actually want, and saves you from awkward regifting.
Shop Smart: Set a deadline for holiday shopping and stick to it. Early shopping means less stress—and you’ll avoid the dreaded shipping delays and long lines.
Photo by SrdjanPav
5. Plan Meals Like a Holiday Chef
Holiday meals are iconic but often overwhelming. Here’s how to tackle the food frenzy with ease:
Simplify Menus: You don’t need a five-course feast. Stick to crowd-pleasers and sprinkle in one or two “wow” dishes if you’re feeling ambitious.
Potluck Power: Hosting? Make it a potluck! Guests bring their specialties, and you focus on the main dish. Bonus: It makes everyone feel involved.
Prep in Advance: Take advantage of freezer-friendly dishes or prep ingredients a few days ahead. That way, you’re not stuck chopping vegetables while everyone else sips eggnog.
Want more tips on leveling up your family gatherings? Check these out!
6. Focus on What Truly Matters
At the heart of the holidays is connection, not a perfectly curated tablescape. Here’s how to keep your priorities in check:
Choose Experiences Over Perfection: Embrace the imperfect moments—burnt cookies, off-key caroling, or mismatched ornaments. These are often the stories you’ll laugh about later!
Make Space for Joy: Schedule time for holiday traditions that bring you happiness, whether it’s a family game night or a solo walk to admire the lights. Block it in your calendar like you would any other appointment.
Practice Gratitude: Reflect on what you’re thankful for this season. It helps shift the focus from what’s stressful to what’s special. You may soon realize— there’s always something to celebrate!
The Magic of Shared Responsibility
At the end of the day, the holidays should be about togetherness, not one person single-handedly orchestrating the whole darn thing. By leaning on tools like eeva to lighten the mental load, you can spread the responsibilities—and the cheer—more evenly.
Let eeva help you stress less and enjoy more. After all, the holidays aren’t about who’s in charge of the holiday party playlist (although it should never start with Jingle Bells). They’re about connection, joy, and maybe even relaxing a little.
Ready to take back your holidays? Download eeva and start sharing the load today.
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